Now that I am a mom of four I have to admit that I hear myself say things that I thought I would NEVER say!  I always thought I was going to be this totally in control, organized, graceful mother whose children adored and respected her.  Well, lets just say that sometimes life has a way of taking what you “thought” was going to happen, and what “actually” happens and making you look rather silly!  But either way, I have decided to make a little list of some of the things that may come out of my mouth on any given day. . .  

“If there is no blood or vomit involved then you better not get out of that bed!”

“Would someone please get J4 out of the toilet?”

“What is that on the wall?  Yes, that brown stuff.  IS THAT POOP on my wall??”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t care if you are hungry, thirsty, scared or want a hug.  You didn’t need or want any of those things before bedtime, why do you need them now?” 

“Do we still have a dog, and if we do has anyone let her out or fed her today?”

“Did you poop today?  What was it like?  Did it hurt?  Do you need some poopy medicine?”

“What do you mean the glass just fell off the counter?  Really, all by itself  it just jumped off and broke into hundreds of pieces?”

“How can you NOT know how YOUR markers, in YOUR room, colored on YOUR wall?”

“What do you mean J4 is stuck in the toy box?  Did you help him before you came to me, or is he still upside down with his feet stuck in the air?”

“Exactly how many days have you had on that pair of underwear?  You do know that when you take a shower you are supposed to put on clean underwear, right?  That’s part of the deal with showering!”

“What do you mean J4 threw up on your face?  Just try to keep it on your face and not let it get on the carpet please!”

Yea, so anyway.  An example of a real life mom in all her glory.

Aaahhhhh, confession time again!

I so did NOT serve peanut butter sandwiches for dinner two nights last week.  I know how important balanced nutrition is for a growing child and I would never compromise the health of my children by serving something like peanut butter sandwiches.  And, if I did serve that for dinner, which I did NOT, I would NOT have added a side of cheetos to go with it.  And to top it off  I would NEVER put them all at the table and turn on Noggin while they ate those peanut butter sandwiches that I did NOT serve.

I did NOT neglect my poor husband almost every night last week because I was working on pictures and learning new techniques in photoshop.  I am so organized that I can do that sort of thing during the day while I am home with the kids!  I would NEVER have to wait until they are all in bed because I can NOT think while they are running through the house and screaming.  But even if I couldn’t do that during the day, I would NOT leave my poor husband to watch TV alone while I stayed up until almost 1 am every night.  That would NOT be the good wife thing to do!

And, I did NOT force my kids to put on their jackets and run 10 laps around the backyard when it was 40 degrees outside.  What kind of a mom would do that?  I love my kids, and their laughing, screaming, chasing, crying, name calling, throwing toys, breaking ornaments, spilling drinks, all in the span of about 10 minutes, would never get to me so much that I had to lock them outside!  But, if I had made them run laps, which I did NOT, I would NOT have been happy when they came in exhausted and cold and just wanted to cuddle with me on the couch!

This is from 2005, so J1 would have just turned 3 yrs old.  I’m only doing this NOW, because I know he would NEVER allow me to do this later!

J1 loves to be “in character” and has basically lived in some costume or another since he was about 2 yrs old.  I love this pic!  Notice the Wiggles underwear over the top of the diaper?!?! 

Enjoy!  And if J1 ever asks, you have never seen this picture!

Ah, yes.  Our little elf friend, Elfis,  is back!  He returned during the early morning hours of Dec. 1st, as promised.  I have to admit that I have a love/hate relationship with Elfis.  He brings out the innocence and curiosity of my 4 J’s, but also the slightly obsessive nature of them as well.  They tip toe around the house and scream at every little shadow, convinced that Elfis is ready to attack them.  If you don’t remember Elfis, you may want to click here :  http://arwoodadventures.blogspot.com/2008/12/elf-attack.html to refresh yourself with his story.

  Hopefully this year will go smoother, and there will be no surprise attacks!  I don’t think J1 or myself could take it.

Long live  “The Elf on the Shelf”!!!