Why do people think that they need to verbalize their opinion on how many children another family has?

Of course this is coming from the story about the Duggar family and that they delivered baby #19 at only 25wks gestation.  Baby Josie weighed in at 1lb and 60z.  Wow!!  Just the thought of that is completely breathtaking!

I will admit, I have made comments such as “How in the world do they give each of their 18 children individual time and attention?”  But then I have to admit that just because I can’t do it doesn’t mean that the Duggar parents are not able to do it.

I read with sadness this morning that baby Josie was born so early.  I felt sad for the mom and family and mostly for Josie.  But then I began to read these awful, judgemental comments about how others feel about this family.  And again, my question is “Why?”  Why do you care???  Are you being asked to care for these children?  Do you have to feed them?”

The Duggar family is a Christian family who believes that children are a gift from God.  Michelle Duggar suffered a miscarriage after her first child was born and was told that the miscarriage was most likely caused by the birth control pills she was taking.  So, heartbroken over the loss of her child, her and her husband decided that they would no longer try to prevent conception, and would welcome any child that God blessed them with.  I can understand her decision.  I myself have had to research birth control options because of my blood clotting issue. 

Even with only four children I have experienced the raised eyebrow  and the “what were you thinking”  and the famous “You do know what causes that don’t you?”  expression and comments.  I also feel the same frustration because I just want to say, “What’s it to you??” 

From what I know about the Duggar family:

- they have strong moral values

- their children are well behaved and respect authority

- they live a structured life and are taught the importance of self discipline

- they are all well fed and clothed

- they live in a house much nicer than the average American

- they helped build the house they live in.  This helps give them a sense of pride about their home, and therefore a respect for property, theirs and someone elses.

- they have no debt.  Everything is bought with cash and as far as I know they do not receive any government assistance

This is not a family that is continually having children and relying on the government to support them.  This is not a family who has numerous, rebellious children that are a threat to society.  This is not a family who is leaving these children to raise themselves with no guidance.

So again, I ask “Why do people care so much?????”

Again, I don’t think that I could raise 19 children.  But just because I can’t do it doesn’t mean that they can’t do it.

Prayers for the Duggar family and baby Josie.  We all know that pregnancy complications and premature birth can happen whether it’s your first or 19th baby.

2 thoughts on “WHY???

  1. It always amazes me how people (even complete strangers) feel they have the right to comment on the decisions you make in your life. I get a lot of comments about not having kids yet. I get the “you don’t want to wait too long” or “you’re going to me that much older before you can get your kids out of the house”. Did it occur to them I may not be counting the days until my kids leave, or that I just want to wait until Ben & I can care for them the best we can? So, I guess we’ve learned that you either have too many kids or not enough! You’re right about the Duggars, I have also been guilty of making comments about how much attention they can give their kids, etc., but they are taking care of themselves & what they do with their lives is their business. I hadn’t heard about the littlest Duggar, how very sad, and how horrible of people to make mean comments! You get em Heather!

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