Now that I am a mom of four I have to admit that I hear myself say things that I thought I would NEVER say!  I always thought I was going to be this totally in control, organized, graceful mother whose children adored and respected her.  Well, lets just say that sometimes life has a way of taking what you “thought” was going to happen, and what “actually” happens and making you look rather silly!  But either way, I have decided to make a little list of some of the things that may come out of my mouth on any given day. . .  

“If there is no blood or vomit involved then you better not get out of that bed!”

“Would someone please get J4 out of the toilet?”

“What is that on the wall?  Yes, that brown stuff.  IS THAT POOP on my wall??”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t care if you are hungry, thirsty, scared or want a hug.  You didn’t need or want any of those things before bedtime, why do you need them now?” 

“Do we still have a dog, and if we do has anyone let her out or fed her today?”

“Did you poop today?  What was it like?  Did it hurt?  Do you need some poopy medicine?”

“What do you mean the glass just fell off the counter?  Really, all by itself  it just jumped off and broke into hundreds of pieces?”

“How can you NOT know how YOUR markers, in YOUR room, colored on YOUR wall?”

“What do you mean J4 is stuck in the toy box?  Did you help him before you came to me, or is he still upside down with his feet stuck in the air?”

“Exactly how many days have you had on that pair of underwear?  You do know that when you take a shower you are supposed to put on clean underwear, right?  That’s part of the deal with showering!”

“What do you mean J4 threw up on your face?  Just try to keep it on your face and not let it get on the carpet please!”

Yea, so anyway.  An example of a real life mom in all her glory.